January 21, 2002 - 2.18 pm
Have you ever been going about your business and all of a sudden you think to yourself "This is the perfect place to start the rest of my life" ? I have. Just today actually.
I got up this morning and had a bowl of Cocoa Pebbles and some orange juice, and read a great book "I Wish I Had A Red Dress" by Pearl Cleage, for a while and then I started cleaning up the apartment. I didn't intend to clean the apartment today, it just happened! I started with my bedroom because my room mate and friend, S, is like a compulsive neat freak and I am sort of sloppy casual. But living with aforementioned compuslive neat freak is sort of bringing out the neat-freak in me. I like our apartment much more when it's clean, I feel more relaxed and able to concentrate because I'm not worrying about the dishes in the sink and the three mile high pile of dirty clothes that have sent out change of address forms, from "The Closet" to "The Middle of the Floor" because it had been so long since I put them away. My room is not the beacon of neatness and orginization that S's is of course, but it's not the Pit of Death and Doom either.
Anyway. Once I got started, I kept going, cleaning the kitchen, vaccuming my room and the living room, cleaning the bathroom. S's twin sister, EC was here last night, and she had to take her back this morning and so I went on this cleaning binge.
After my cleaning binge, I settled in for some reading, (I'm taking a biopsych class that is going to kick my ass) and took a shower and that's when it happened. The MOMENT. Our hot water only lasts between 4.5 and 6.5 minutes so taking a shower is sort of a harried event, but I'm getting used to it. And I was mentally going through what I needed to do toady, and I realized that I really love it here. In my somewhat ghetto college apartment, with my somewhat neurotic but wonderful room mate, a satanic/cuddly cat, the best friends in the entire world, a family that loves me only 45 minutes away, classes that challenge me, the Flatirons visable from my bedroom window, and I'm figuring things out. Life certainly isn't perfect, I'm certainly not perfect, but I am in the perfect place for the beginning of the rest of my life. I can still feel like a vital part of my family, and develop a sense of self away from the role of daughter and big sister. Boulder is the perfect place for a flaming liberal in Colorado, I'm exploring all kinds of volunteer oppurtunities, and being exposed to all different kinds of ideas and dogmas and lifestyles, and I still feel secure enough in myself to be true to my lifestyle and ideas.
So I'm going to try to get back on schedule and leave a little time for writing each day and enjoy this new phase of my life.
I hope you decide to stick around for the ride!
Emily
